Many Names;but just one Meaning: It's Self Respect

I had actually posted my one year old daughter's picture in which she was wearing a hijab (headscarf) and i got amazed with responses or rather questions from my friends. Of course it was a mix of positive and negative views on making my daughter wear that. Most repeated question was when you have never posted your picture wearing a burqa, why did you dress up your daughter like that.....True, I have never posted my picture in burqa, but, those who know me very well and see me regularly, know that, I wear burqa to my office every day and where ever i go, It's just that i have never posted, or in that case, i don't remember when was the last time I stood for a photograph. And, it seems like my daughter is the only person, who gets to get photographed by my husband every day almost, at least with a mobile phone. So, i will definitely post my picture too in burqa, but, i dont know when....

So, coming back to my friends' questions and responses, everyone was asking me the same: why do you want to do this to Sarah?she is only a child and why cant she wear it after marriage? So, to all of you, for the record, I don't intend to make her wear it now...but, once she is 6/7 year old, she will wear it and I am definitely going to encourage her wearing it.

There are so many reasons for me to take such a decision at a time of when child abuses are in the rise in the country and where sexual preferences of people are becoming more public and open for discussion. Don't think me as very conservative or religious freak, but, just sit and think what is happening in the country.

Wearing burqa gives me self confidence more than i have ever felt when i was not wearing burqa before.And, more importantly, it gives me self respect and an identity that I am girl and no one will ever dare to tease or criticize me or my anatomy. And, I get so much of a sense of freedom that i have completely stopped worrying how my dress looks, and how do i look like in it and is there something exposed and what do i have to cover up in it and am i walking properly in this outfit etc etc etc..there are millions of questions and I am sure every girl will understand what am I talking about. And, everything just vanished like magic with just one dress:Burqa...

You go to meeting an important client or to a conference or anything and all you have to prepare is about what do you gonna talk there, not about your lip shade matching with your dress color or the sandal matching it. nothing...For me, its a boon, its a bliss....the passion on buying dresses from latest fashion line and everything else seem to be a stone age custom to me now.

Leave off such things, if you are not a fashionista, and just think what a sense of freedom and protection it gives. I am not advocating here for everyone to wear it, because that would be so foolish of me, but, i am trying to make some clarification to all those who think burqa is a forced curse on Islamic women. NO. I don't think so.

For children, they get a deeper self acknowledgement of their sex as female and they preserve every tiny little element of femininity in them, that they will never have a confusion over their sexual preferences when they grow up. And, for those, who think burqa poses only restriction and slavery on girls, let me make it straight: Girls wearing burqa are in schools, colleges, offices, governments and we are there where ever you are.

And, as far as those women doing foul play over not removing their veils and hijabs for security checks, they can always remove it to a woman police officer or any other woman authority in such a situation and I am sure every modern country in this world have women police officers and why can't they just let their women police force to do such security checks? The women are anyways meant to be handled by women police force even legally and why can't this be followed to avoid unnecessary issues like banning the burqa?

Not just for me, but every burqa clad woman, its just not a dress; its self confidence, self respect and identity.

The day I met The Maestro...........Raja Sir.......

Its going to be some time, even quite a few years, say 2 or 3 years now. Yet, that day, that evening is still fresh in my memories and I can still replay it in my mind.

It was October and we were given an appointment at 5pm at his Studio. Our CEO, my husband and I were little nervous and had already reached the nearby hotel an hour earlier. And, just as predicted, it started raining and we were asked to come at 6 by his manager. Another hour just went by leaving our CEO and my husband relaxed for a while and making me more and more nervous for I had my doubts of whether would meet him or not. And, I was self assuring repeatedly within myself.

It was 6 and his manager called us and informed us to come to his residence, because Raja sir had already left the studio due to heavy rain. I became even more nervous, "will he cancel at the last minute saying, he wouldn't meet anyone at home...?".And, all the while I conveniently forgot that our CEO and my husband was there to meet him to get his consent for conferring him a honorary doctorate for his outstanding contribution to the field of music by an foreign university and I happen to be handling their operations in India. I had forgotten my career profile and was jumping like a 7 yr old kid, coming to an Amusement park for the first time.

"Will he accept?"- It was my CEO. I just came back to reality and tried hard not to show my excitement and brought a cute diplomat smile on my face and said, "I think yes". and, much to my dismay,"I heard myself saying"Who Cares?"....OMG...how can i be so irresponsible like this....

We were on the way to his home and all I could think of was how he will talk, and whether he will talk to me or just to my CEO and ignore my presence.....After all, why should he care? I was completely silent and didnt realize when we reached his residence for two reasons, one being i never knew before where he lived and the minute my husband asked me to get down, I could feel my heart beat racing like an F1.

We just entered and some how I gathered the courage to ask my husband is his camera ready. Because after all these thinking of will he talk to me or not and all, what I concluded was whether or not he talks to me, I should get a photograph with him at the least.

So, when we went in, Raja sir came out from the room, what seemed to be a study room and sat on the couch, asking us to sit. I think, our CEO must have guessed on my madness on meeting him, as he could apparently see how am I behaving so insanely and childish...So, he simply showed me the seat next to Raja sir and sat next to me. I gave him a thanking smile and sat near Raja sir completely blank and silent. It was my husband that started the conversation, giving him the introductions and all the required details of the purpose of the meeting. He carefully listened to him and simply said, "I am not a public person as how you think, I am very remote and aloof. I just think of music for the whole day, whether or not I am doing any project."

I first thought, he is giving a small speech and at the end he is going to say OK. He continued saying a lot of things about how he takes Music what is music to him and all.. our CEO interrupted him saying, whatever you are saying now is all the reason why we wanted to honor your contribution. Raja sir went silent for a minute and I was like, why did he interrupt raja sir now...he should have let him speak so I could have heard him for some more time.....

Raja sir, suddenly looked at me and asked "have you heard of my songs?" thinking that I must be living in US since I was working for a US university. I went blank once again at his question and blinked like a kid when asked what is Einstein's Adiabatic Theory?. Then the next second, I just blushed and said " I grew up with your music and now, I am living it.". And, he gave me an approving nod and a smile. He just turned to our CEO and said, this is all I had earned all these years, a whole new generation of youngsters like her, still listening and enjoying my music.And, this is all enough for me. People like you, a Foreign university conferring a doctorate will be a great honor for me, but I would suggest you to look for other people who had gone unnoticed and do this honor to them, that would really help them." And, with that he finished the meeting and offered us some juice.

 He then noticed the camera in my husband's hands and graciously asked our CEO to come closer for the photos and I joined them, but still having the urge to take a separate photo of just him and I. I think he must have sensed that. And, he asked me to come and stand next to him and I should thank my husband for taking that photograph so nicely and of course giving me that wonderful opportunity to meet him.I always feel great, happy and privileged to have met him, spent some 20 minutes with him.

I still think of as."why did he not accept such an honor and only one possible answer comes to my mind, that "Only Raja sir could say such a thing"....

Just happened to see someone tweeting that "the 'i' in my iPad stands for Ilayaraja"...and thought how true it is...I would say, for me, Ilayaraja is the music......

Watched the Tamil movie "Avan - Ivan"

Ok, For the records, I am a huge fan of national Award winning director Mr.Bala. I still can't seem to get out of "Pithamagan" "Sethu' & "Nandha".

Yesterday, I watched "Avan-Ivan", after reading a lot of online reviews and other channel reviews.The simple reason because, all i get is just one day, as my off and that Sunday is again my only full day I get to spend with my 1.3 year old daughter, so I would never want to waste my day in movies at all. But, then Bala and his movies are always an exception. (I still dint watch hislast movie "Naan kadavul" because I was duly requested/warned/advised not to watch it by my friends/well wishers. So, i dint and I still wonder what might be the reason!!!)

Anyways, I went and watched the movie 'Avan-Ivan' because, almost all of the review sources said, Bala is back in form, once again giving his best which is fusing comedy and emotional quotient with human values, so touchingly and so emotionally.  I was happy that I am going to watch something on the likes of Nandha or Sethu.

But, After watching the movie, or should I say, even while watching the movie, I couldn't help, but find the striking similarity between "Pithamagan" and 'Avan-Ivan". The outline is same, two carefree young guys, living life on their own terms. The premises are same, Poor, Petit theives, love interest. An illegal profession they cross their path with, A Ganja farm in Pithamagan and a cattle business here. A very emotional death just before the climax - Surya there and G.M.Kumar here and then a gory climax.

Finished. But, you know what, I just cant find the emotional quotient here in 'Avan-Ivan" as how i felt so involved in 'Pithamagan", though Pithamagan was set on a highly unrelated premises to a common man.(How many times you come across people like Vikram in your real life?) I was trying my best to laugh out when ever Arya or that small boy (in a huge pack n a loud mouth) were doing comedy. But, Alas...I just can't. I still can remember Surya's entrepreneurial achievements in Pithamagan, be it legiyam sales or the mobile auction in the train.

Coming to the romantic side of the movie, my god, what's wrong with Bala sir? Are those two girls so dumb n stupid n silly enough to fall in love with our heroes for no reason at all? Or, is it just because, they are our heroes and no matter what or whoever these girls are, should fall in love with them? The so casual and natural love that was there between the mean yet good natured Surya and the so innocent Laila was like a dream to enjoy.

Music: Don't know. Sorry. No idea. and, you know how was it in Pithamagan. 'Elankaathu Veesudhe" was, is still my ringtone.
G.M.Kumar - Poor guy, running naked around at this age, just for the reason, he believes, Bala will do wonder. R.K - Once again, given a promise of break through and probably asked to grow beard and hair for 3-5 months, believing Bala will justify this hairy (scary) process. Arya - He does what he is to. simple. Vishal - All the pain of making a squint eye and emoting so well and yet making us so uneasy because of poor characterization, with no purpose.(May be he will get a National Award) Surya cameo - beep.beep.beep(just like BHTB)

I was running out of time waiting for something to happen, some place for the story to begin, some seriousness to show and it was the last 30 minutes the story took off and it was already too late for me to make myself serious or emotional to mourn for G.M.Kumar;s death. I was completely blank, felt numb and more irritated at his death  blaming myself for not able to get into it.

And, I am not gonna write how was Surya's murder in Pithamagan, because, even now, if I happen to watch it on TV, I feel very sad and gets silent till he is cremated in the movie. Anyways, that was a time.....

I have never criticized any movie before, for I don't actually spend any time on it. Just wait till some channel telecasts it. And, which is why I had to shed my anger out here doing a review.

But, as I said before, Bala is always an exception. And, will wait for the master maker to really do some magic next time.